World in the Satin Bag

World in the Satin Bag

5 Ways to Explain Scifi Obsession to Friends

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We all have that one friend who doesn’t get science fiction. Some of us have probably gone through the annoying experience of trying to explain it and realized how futile such a thing really is. But maybe we’ve failed because we haven’t bothered to try one of the following five options: –I’m an Alien!Look, your friends already think you’re insane for having Star Wars figurines lining your walls or stacks of science fiction books filling up your shelves. What harm could it do to take that insanity to the next level? Explain that your love for the genre is due to a long lost urge to reclaim the glory of your former galactic empire! At least there might be something strangely normal about saying that (especially if you’re British). –Theater BirthMaybe they’d understand you if they thought you had been born during the opening credits of Star Wars, or shared a birthday with twelve of the greatest science fiction writers of all time (thanks to some clever quasi-time-travel handiwork). Heck, you could even tell them your first word was a Wookie war cry thanks to a year of clever brainwashing by your scifi-crazed parents, in which you were exposed, twenty-four hours a day, to non-stop scifi goodies. Your friends will understand. Really. –Speculative PrescriptionThere’s nothing like explaining away one level of “crazy” than by claiming you’re crazy in a different way, and that your new crazy is medication. There are all sorts of weird treatments out there, and it wouldn’t be that difficult to accept that some radical psychiatrist out there wants to treat your mental defects with a bit of spaceship-and-explosions-laced fun. If you really wanted to, you could cook up some fake prescription notices to your local Blockbuster. Might be fun… –Only Wimps Get OldSome people see science fiction obsession as a sort of desperation to remain a child. After all, it’s all escapist garbage, right? And you should just grow up and be like everyone else. I mean, come on, being into science fiction is like being a forty-year-old fat man with a beard hanging out at an Anime convention; it happens, but it’s just not natural…But screw that. Tell them you don’t want to grow up. You’re a Toys’R’Us kid, or something like that, and you’ll be damned if you’ll throw away all your fun for a suit, a tie, and a mediocre cubicle in the 9-to-5 grind. Science fiction is about life (and liberty, and the pursuit of happiness)! You’re seizing the day, as the ancients used to say. –The Economy Needs Lovin’ TooStill, there’s nothing like explaining to your friends just how important science fiction is to the economy. Just show them the sales figures of the last ten years of science fiction film in the U.S. and you’ll have ample evidence as to why the genre makes the world go round. And that’s not including books, action figures, collectible cards, board games, pajamas, t-shirts, food products, and novelty bedroom attire for the ladies (nothing like a little Spidey lingerie, eh?). Without sciffy nuts like you, the sales industry would be a damned boring place. And don’t forget to mention all the advances in technology thanks to science fiction: everything from new ways to make films to new technologies and ideas that make our lives easier. Plus, our current President is a sciffy fan, and if it’s good enough for the President, it’s good enough for you, right? But maybe all these options are a little too over-the-top for you. You can stick with the same old boring answers if you want, but these five suggestions might spice things up a bit. If you’ve ever tried anything like this, let me know in the comments. I’d like to know the different ways you folks have tried to explain your obsessions to your friends, science fiction-based or not!

World in the Satin Bag

Ten Things No Writer Should Ever Do

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There are a lot of things writers shouldn’t do, but there are some things that a writer really shouldn’t do. Here is a list of ten things no writer should ever do: Send a long-winded biography not limited to your writing career.Not only do we (editors) not give a crap, but your query letter or cover letter should be short and sweet, telling us only the things we need to know to assess your manuscript. Most editors don’t even need a cover letter, but a good story is a good story, regardless of where someone was published or not published before. Sometimes a quirky fact about yourself is cute, but beyond that, we just don’t care about your life story! Send files in formats not specified.If the guidelines say send your submission in .doc or .rtf form, then send it in .doc or .rtf form. More than likely, the editors can’t open other file types, or have no clue what those others are. I’ve received everything from .docx to .odt to .pages, the latter two of which are for programs I don’t even have on my computer. If it can’t be opened, it can’t be read! Demand to be paid in a form that isn’t specified in the guidelines.Generally speaking, if the guidelines say “paypal only,” that means “paypal only.” But sure, demand to be paid by Western Union (or whatever it’s called now). Coincidentally, the person who demanded this also told us she was a forty plus year old woman, and our guidelines specifically stated that twenty-five was the cap. What can you do? Argue about a decision.If we don’t want your submission, arguing with us about it isn’t going to change our minds. In fact, it might make us turn to disliking you. Take a rejection like a man…or a woman. It’s part of the writing life. Forget to attach your submission.Okay, so this one isn’t as bad as the others, but it’s a silly mistake that you really shouldn’t do, for obvious reasons. Usually we laugh about it, but after a while it gets tiresome to send the same email out over and over. Send an insulting email.Something about someone emailing you to tell you that you’re a scumbag for rejecting their submission and that you should burn in hell forever is truly uplifting. People still do this, and it puzzles me why. I thought the object of submitting was to get published. How does one expect to do that if he or she insults everyone who rejects them? Stalk someone and post hateful comments on their email.Remember that Cole A. Adams incident? Don’t do that. Seriously. It’s bad news for you and anyone around you. It’s also a good example of career suicide, and if you can’t help yourself, then seek psychiatric help. They have pills for that kind of thing. Send dead animals to a publisher or editor.According to a rather epic story, Harlan Ellison did something like this. But Harlan Ellison got away with it because he was/is Harlan Ellison. Nowadays, I don’t think even J. K. Rowling could get away with that. This applies to any sort of shipment of illegal or unorthodox items to a publisher or editor, including, but not limited to, razor blades, pipe bombs, letter bombs, bricks, cocaine, marijuana, poison food items, anthrax, and rotten fruit. Tell someone about your criminal convictions or crimes you’ve committed and have yet to get caught for.I suppose this one would fit on a list of stupid things people do in general, but there’s really nothing stupider than admitting to someone who might be inclined to publish your story for kids that you are a convicted pedophile. Honestly. It’s also not a good idea to tell an editor that you killed a man once and never served any time. That’s not information editors want to be burdened with. If you must confess, do so with a police officer. I’m sure they’d be more than happy to help relieve your burden. Plagiarize.This is the big no-no, and no matter how many times people say don’t do it, there is always someone willing to take the risk. Sometimes they can get away with it, and others times not, but when you consider what happens to you if you don’t get away with it, why would you ever take the risk? I don’t know about you, but I’m not particularly fond of hefty fees or jail time. I like eating and my apartment is cozy… What about you? What do you think are some things that writers shouldn’t do? Let me know in the comments!

World in the Satin Bag

Survival By Storytelling, Issue One for sale!

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Well, I know you’ve all been waiting for this for quite a while, and it’s finally here. Survival By Storytelling Magazine, Issue One is up for sale at Lulu for a mere $9.00 in print and $5.00 in electronic format! You can purchase it here. The magazine will also be appearing on Createspace and Amazon in time, but the process for those two is different from Lulu, and longer, but you’ll hear from me as soon as it happens. For now, you can get your copy of SBS from Lulu. And in case you wanted to know why you should purchase the issue, here’s some incentive:–We have some amazing fiction and poetry from writers new and old, all twenty-five and under, many of them members of YWO (Diocletian, Mercy, Adri, Nyx, Tegzz, and Crocolyle, unless I’m missing anyone).–We have an interview with author Paul Genesse (The Golden Cord and The Dragon Hunters; he has also written many short stories for collections published by DAW). He also wrote us a fine article about writing.–There is also an article by author T. M. Hunter in here, author of Heroes Die Young.–Every sale of SBS pays our authors. Since we pay by royalties, every sale is directly helping the contributors, and that’s a good thing, right?–Every sale also helps Young Writers Online, which is also good. Mostly the money goes to contributors, but YWO gets a little bit out of it too, and that goes to making sure we can have more contests in the future!–It’ll make you feel good inside. Trust me. SBS is like chocolate, only better. So go out and get your copy now! As for the contributors: you’ll be getting an email from me shortly in regards to free copies for you, which wasn’t in the contract, but, hey, I feel that you deserve something for your patience. Plus, it’s standard practice anyway! Lastly, please advertise about SBS. I’ll try to get some promotional images together, but if you could blog about us, that would be great. Spread the word and let everyone know what you think about the magazine! Thanks to everyone who has been supportive of this endeavor over the last year+. It’s been a lot of work and we’re glad to be done, if not a little misty-eyed about it. Thanks to all who contributed, and here’s to a good opening run!

World in the Satin Bag

Interview w/ David Marusek

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David Marusek is the author of Counting Heads and Mind Over Ship, the latter of which I reviewed here. You can also find Mr. Marusek at his website. On with the interview: Thank you very much for doing this interview. First things first, can you tell us a little bit about yourself? What got you into writing in the first place, and why science fiction? I’m a middle-aged man living in a cabin in Interior Alaska. I’m single (attention, ladies), love dogs, love to chainsaw firewood, dip for salmon, and spend time in the bush. I always wanted to write, but I only got started seriously in 1986. I thought I would write about a million books, but as it turns out, I’m a very slow writer (my editor says deliberate, not slow). I started out trying to write literary fiction, but I couldn’t get the hang of it. Then someone told me about the Clarion workshops, and I attended Clarion West in Seattle. I sold my first fiction to Gardner Dozois at Asimov’s during the workshop and have been publishing ever since. I seem to have a crazy inventive mind that feels at home with SF, and I love the SF community of writers and fans. Who are some of your favorite authors? Books? I don’t read as much fiction as I used to. Recently, the writer who wows me the most is Jim Crace, a Brit, and two of his books I highly rec are The Pesthouse and Being Dead. He’s not a genre writer, but The Pesthouse is a post-apocalyptic tale much better than Cormac McCarthy’s much-hyped The Road. Mind Over Ship is, in my opinion, a fairly unique novel because it incorporates a plethora of high-concept ideas (such as your fascinating take on the future of human cloning). What was your inspiration for Mind Over Ship (and obviously its predecessor, Counting Heads)? I had two images stuck in my mind that, when combined, was the genesis of Counting Heads. One was of two parents holding a baby that they “retro-conceived.” That is, their own DNA was overwriting the baby’s own genes. In my mind I saw the baby in an in-between state. The other was of a wife abandoning her husband on a busy street when he is captured by a mechanical security device. That’s pretty much how my stories get started, with a compelling image or idea that persists sometimes for years until I do something with it. Since your novel deals extensively with the issue of cloning, do you see human cloning becoming a reality in our near future (not just cloning cells or eggs, but cloning actual people)? Do you think our response to that will be a good one or a bad one? Yes, I see cloning whole humans happening in the near future. At first it will probably be done by unscrupulous people just to see if it can be done. World reaction will be overwhelmingly negative. All world religions will condemn the practice. Even secular humanists will be outraged. I’m not sure if cloning will ever become a standard practice. In other SF stories, the basis for cloning humans has been to raise great armies of superior soldiers or as living tissue banks for wealthy persons, but I don’t see that happening. Other technologies will fill those needs. In my own books, the labor force is made up of specialized, contented clones. This presumes that personality is tied to DNA, probably more-so that it actually is, but it makes a dandy conceit for fiction. (I have recently learned about epigenetics, which probably plays a major role in this.) Which if your clone models in Mind Over Ship is your favorite? Why? The Lulus, because they’re hot! Do you plan to write new stories in the universe of Mind Over Ship? Yes, installment #3 is bubbling in the back of my head. I’ve been moiling in the CH and MOS universe for about 15 years, though, and I need a break from it. My current novel project is completely unrelated. In fact, it’s set in contemporary America. It’s all very hush-hush, and I can’t say anything about it. What other projects do you have coming up and can you tell us a little about them? Besides the novel, I’m doing a fantasy story, my first effort in that genre. It’s called “Modern Parenting–Circa 2006,” and it makes me smile every time I think about it. It’s about a father with a very special ability, and a daughter addicted to danger. Switching gears, what do you think about the present state of the book industry, both on the selling end and on the making end? What about eBooks/readers? Publishing seems to be buffeted by the economy and technological advances. No one knows what it’ll look like in five or ten years, but I think authors may become empowered through POD and ebook tech. I bought a Kindle, and I’m trying to figure out what to do with it. What unusual piece of writing advice would you give to a budding writer? (Emphasis on unusual) See a doctor. No matter how pretty the bloom may be, budding is not usually healthy for humans. And now for a silly question: If you could be any animal on the planet, which animal would you be and why? A dodo, to mess with biologists’ minds.

World in the Satin Bag

Haul of Books: Friends of the Library Edition

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There was an enormous book sale here in Gainesville over the last few days and I thought I’d let you all know what I got (a lot of stuff, actually). Next time, in April, I don’t think I will be going quite as all out, mostly because I don’t have as much need for a lot of books anymore. I intentionally went this year trying to find things to use for my research, and now I’m only missing a few things. If you’ve bought any new books in the last few days, let me know in the comments. Here goes (sorry, no pictures; there’s just too much): Science Fiction and Fantasy–The Once and Future King by T. H. White–Snow Crash by Neal Stephenson–Forest Mage by Robin Hobb–Crossfire by Nancy Kress–Alastair Reynolds by Redemption Ark–A War of Shadows by Jack L. Chalker–The Pscyhotechnic League by Poul Anderson–The Continent of Lies by James Morrow–Land of Unreason by L. Sprague de Camp and Fletcher Pratt–A Day For Damnation by David Gerrold–Other Americas by Norman Spinrad–The Face of Chaos edited by Robert Lynn Asprin and Lynn Abbey–New Writings in SF8 edited by John Carnell–The Web of the Chozen by Jack L. Chalker–Nightwings by Robert Silverberg–Heads by Greg Bear–Molt Brother by Jacqueline Lichtenberg–Mahogany Trinrose by Jacqueline Lichtenberg–Shardik by Richard Adams–Continuum 2 edited by Roger Elwood–The Four Lords of the Diamon by Jack L. Chalker–Danger Human by Gordon R. Dickson–The Book of Skaith by Leigh Brackett–Worlds of Maybe edited by Robert Silverberg–Threads of Time edited by Robert Silverberg–The Children of Men by P. D. James–The Book of the Dun Cow by Walter Wangerin, Jr.–The Anubis Gates by Tim Powers–The State of the Art by Iain M. Banks–The Player of Games by Iain M. Banks–Use of Weapons by Iain M. Banks–Peace on Earth by Stanislaw Lem–Helliconia Spring by Brian W. Aldiss–Helliconia Winter by Brian W. Aldiss–Becoming Alien by Rebecca Ore–Quicksand by John Brunner–An Exaltation of Stars edited by Terry Carr–The Final Planet by Andrew M. Greeley–Saturn’s Children by Charles Stross–The Urth of the New Sun by Gene Wolfe–The Android’s Dream by John Scalzi–Gateway by Frederik Pohl–Magic Study by Maria V. Snyder–Child of the River by Paul J. McAuley–The Man Who Folded Himself by David Gerrold–Brothers of Earth by C. J. Cherryh–The Sentimental Agents (A Canopus in Argos novel) by Doris Lessing–Shikasta (A Canopus in Argos novel) by Doris Lessing–The Fringe of the Unknown by L. Sprague de Camp Other Fiction (including magical realism, etc.)–Invisible Man by Ralph Ellison–Middlemarch by George Eliot–Uncle Tom’s Cabin by Harriet Beecher Stowe–The Rise of Silas Lapham by William Dean Howells–The Physick Book of Deliverance Dane by Katherine Howe–World Without End by Ken Follett–Love, Again by Doris Lessing–The Island of the Day Before by Umberto Eco–Baudolino by Umberto Eco–The Mysterious Flame of Queen Loana by Umberto Eco–Labyrinths by Jorge Luis Borges–Love in the Time of Cholera by Gabriel Garcia Marques–Concrete Island by J. G. Ballard–The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho–On the Road by Jack Kerouac— Non-fiction–At the Edge of History by William Irwin Thompson–The Machine in the Garden by Leo Marx–African Studies Review, Volume 47, Number 3–History and Memory, Volume 19, Number 2, Fall/Winter 2007–Nationalism by Eli Kedourie I also got a book called Religion in Colonial America by William Warren Sweet And that’s all I got, without paying a whole lot of money at all. Today was 10 cent day, by the way. I got a box of books for $3.60. Now that’s a steal!

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